October 4
Welcome every blow that roughens the smoothness of the earth — every goad that bids you neither sit nor stand, but go.
Rabbi Ben Ezra (freely rendered)
Listening mode
Welcome every blow that roughens the smoothness of the earth — every goad that bids you neither sit nor stand, but go.
A task that was hard for you for a long time eventually comes easily. That is a good state to be in, and you worked hard to reach it. You know where the mistakes lie in wait and get around them before they happen.
After a while, a quiet dissatisfaction makes itself felt within it. Nothing has gone wrong, and that is exactly what makes it strange. You could treat it like a minor disturbance: a better schedule, a free afternoon, and it goes away. Often that even works.
What's harder is that this unease can mean two things. Sometimes you are simply tired. Sometimes you have settled into something and are no longer looking for anything in it. From the inside, both feel the same. And success doesn't make the distinction any easier, because every day it hands you a good reason to stay.
Perhaps you ask yourself a question you haven't asked in a long time: what can you not yet do in this? If nothing comes to mind, that may reassure you. But it may also mean that you haven't looked in quite a while.
